Turning FORTY was quite the milestone for me. I thought about it all year long, not only because I’ve always been told I look young and couldn’t wait to say “I’m actually 40!”, but because I knew it was a marker of life.

 

I remember 40 seeming so old, so already done, but now I realize it is in so many ways the best time to get started. What a peace of mind that comes; a badge of honor earned.

I decided to write a list of my lessons that lead to forty….

FORTY FAVORITES

1. It’s ok to be perfectly imperfect
2. We always have a choice
3. Forgiving frees the soul
4. Pizza is ALWAYS better with a diet coke
5. We can choose JOY
6. There is such a thing as retail therapy
7. Sometimes the hardest thing, is also the right thing
8. We can be BRAVE
9. Gluten-free will never taste like the real thing
10. It’s ok to get lost in the Hallmark Channel
11. We can be TRUE
12. Commit to growth in every relationship
13. People really do the best they can with what they have
14. Our children are our greatest legacy
15. Our diagnosis is NEVER our destiny
16. High expectations are ok, people will rise to them
17. We can be BOLD
18. Not everyone will always understand
19. Our main responsibility is to train the hearts of our children
20. Be GRATEFUL..for all of it
21. You’ll never regret taking the high road
22. We are never too old for Pink Bubblegum Ice cream
23. We can be FEARLESS
24. Glitter makes everything better
25. God qualifies the called
26. Everyone wants to feel important
27. Suicide isn’t selfish
28. NO really can be a complete sentence
29. A smile makes everyone more beautiful in an instant
30. Self-love is always #1
31. If they gossip to you, they’ll gossip about you
32. Preserve the relationship over the business
33. Income follows personal growth
34. A beautiful sunset reminds us of the reality of Heaven
35. Not every friendship will last a lifetime, but every one will teach a lesson
36. Sometimes a $5 coffee is worth it
37. Work ethic cannot be bought
38. Every choice has a consequence, good or bad
39. You can’t reach GREAT if you settle for GOOD(enough)
40. Gummy bears can fix anything… (or anything gummy)
41. PRAY often, about everything

 

nicole

It was a powerful day speaking to a room full of hundreds of women. Everyone there for the same reason; to grow as a woman, a mom, and an entrepreneur. To have a breakthrough, to live their lives without limits. While we all arrived at different places in our journeys, we had one occurring theme that continued to come up throughout the entire day,  F-E-A-R.

 

False Evidence Appearing Real. Face Everything And Rise. Feel Everything And Run!

It was in every talk particularly relating to how we get stuck. Fear is an epidemic today– We fear beginnings and endings, changing and staying the same, success and failure, living and dying, strength and vulnerability.

How we handle fear is an ultimate game-changer in our businesses and our lives.

Webster’s defines fear as ‘an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat’.

I don’t typically look up official word definitions, but what stood out to me was the word belief. In other words, our own beliefs about a situation determines our fear. Interesting. When my daughter Ali was born and diagnosed with a genetic, fatal disease called Cystic Fibrosis, by far my strongest emotion was fear even far beyond the devastation.

The journey of overcoming that fear not only as a mom, but teaching her to overcome her own fear of a life-threatening disease, has been a journey full of lessons I believe every woman can benefit from both personally and professionally. I’ve learned…

• The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.

Most of us wait until we are no longer afraid before we do something, instead of understanding the only way to overcome fear is by taking action, and staying in action. Do it afraid.

• We experience fear when we do something unfamiliar but so does everyone else.

Many times we feel alone in our fear, but understanding that everyone feels it can take away it’s power. The successful and fearless just take their fear along with them and do it anyway.

• Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from feeling helpless.

When we don’t push through our fears we have a ‘helpless’ feeling of being out of control, sometimes waiting for the ball to drop. We live in the “what-if’s?”.

Raising Ali has taught me to become fearless, in spite of my own fears as her mom. I love sharing our message with the world.

 

Be fearless,

nicole

The reality of photo shoots. I’ve done so many in the recent years and they are WORK, but they look fun, happy, easy and effortless. Recently I was reviewing (cringing at) my final proofs (why can we take 100 and 10 look good? #ugh), and this shot made me laugh with reality.

Pictures almost always look perfect as the finished product.

But we often don’t see the behind the scenes.

Just like life. And social media. We see the highlight reel. The best of the best, and rarely the chaos behind the scenes. And many times we compare ourselves to someone’s highlight reel.

Well….

THIS picture captures that perfectly.

We were downtown Denver and you can see the remaining confetti in my hair from throwing it above. (In. The. Poof…y. Skirt. that was so itchy!) and they had me quick change into the gold (itchier!) leggings which you can clearly see the crotch hangs way low (which I had to demonstrate ha!) and my behind hangs out just a little.

BUT you never see that.

You see the final, touched up, front view perfect picture.

I kind of like this one even better.

It was funny.  I almost fell.  My jeans are on the bench because I had to put those on next (As. People. Walked. By).

So, THIS is real life.

Behind the scenes. Poofy skirts, gold sparkle itchy leggings, and left-over confetti.

Go easy on yourself when you see the highlight reel. There is always behind the scenes we don’t see, and sometimes those are the real story.

nicole